Since April is “Autism Awareness Month,” I wanted to tell what autism is like for me. In my book, I’m So Glad You Found Me in Here, I give a little idea of what living with autism is like.
“I can’t begin to explain how quiet you feel when the rest of the world speaks. I know only too well. I have lived in silence. I have gotten used to it, having never had the opportunity to speak. It is very lonely much of the time. People talk to me, but I have no way to respond. I want to have the chance to open my mouth to just talk like the rest of the world does, but nothing happens. I know the words I want to say but nothing seems to work. My tongue and my lips will not form the words I wish to speak. My body will not cooperate with my mind.
Even though I have learned to deal with this disability, the world is a strange and scary place. I have no gift of speaking to protect my family or myself. I have no way of shouting or telling them that I need help or that they might be in danger. The world is a frightening place to live in when you have no ability to help yourself. It really took me a long time to understand why I could not talk like the people around me. The inability to communicate my thoughts or feelings has left me alone to find my own quiet place in a world over which I have no control.”
Having no way to communicate is like being down in a deep hole. You know you are there, but you cannot let anyone else know. You are living, hoping that help will come to your rescue. Help is finally here for many of us, giving a means to having a dream come true. For me the gift came when I was eleven.
My happiness is indescribable. I only pray others like me will find their own method to let the world know that they have much to say.